LUST

Our souls intertwined
Like a raging fire.
I draw my breath
As your lips nestled on my breast
And your hands lit a fire
That burns me with desire
Kisses that is light as feathers
Smoothly touches
Every bared inch
Making one pure soul’s sanity
Gone lost on a thin air of uncertainty.

NOTHINGNESS

i keep on reaching
on the everlasting sky
wishing that if only i can have
what my heart desires...
i was fallen
into the pit of darkness
where nothingness
frezzes my soul...
icy cold
that hurts like a thorn
drains the blood on my system
& watered it to the withering plant
of my own sin
until i have nothing
no more to give...

WOUNDED

I am selfish, I know
i made you cry with sorrow
but i wanted to touch
your body so much...
i am sorry
for staining you this way
but all i wanted tonight
is for you to be wounded by me
i am cruel, i know
but this is how
I LOVE YOU...


-BLACKROSE431990

FORGOTTEN

Everything start fading
like a withered rose of memories
when yesterday becomes forgotten...
I don't remember why i am crying,
but I know inside i am hurting
like my heart is on fire and burning...
I know the sky does not change,
but the feeling of insanely in-love
does not remain...
The rain won't stop to fall
until this pain will vanished
from my soul...
The day will come
when a new rainbow will paint the sky
and eventually I'll forget
why I even cry...

-BLACKROSE431990

tears for a stranger

today, august 2, 2010, i read a note in my friend's memo board about her feelings towards a strangers death. she told me about this person who committed a suicide. she told me that she had read this person's profile on facebook telling everyone "goodbye". she started crying while telling me his words, his friends' frustrations on his actions. i tried to hold my tears while listening to my friend. but then, tears fall down in my eyes like a river. i felt bad about him. how could he end his life while some people are willing to pay millions or billions just to live for long? how could he ignored those people who'd been there at his side, not giving him up? how could he gave up on his life? but then i thought, "who am i to ask him these questions?".
"i, myself thought of ending my life too. but the thought of people who stayed beside me made me fear DEATH itself. i admit that there are times that i felt giving up. but still i have a lot of things to hold and gives me support to smile and stand proudly." these are the words i'll give him if we were given a chance to become friends. i'm willing to give him advice if he becomes my friend. or maybe i will scold him that it is a stupid idea to end it his way. or tell him that he is a selfish person who doesn't considers others feeling. or i will say," you are such an arrogant person thinking your self as the most problematic man in the world!".
i know he has a lot of problems. well, everyone has. not only him. if it's about love, their's a lot to come. if it is about work, maybe god has a plan on promoting you into a better position. but still i can't keep my tears from falling, feeling sorry for him.

"if you only think twice before you did this to your self...goodbye stranger...may god forgive you of your sin."

ROSE PETALS

FROM a seed to a perfect bloom.
but then, how will you know that this little thing will bloom when time comes?
daw ka budlay noh?
eighten years ago, sino maghuna-huna nga ako matawo sa kalibotan nga daya? i grew up nga medyo tig-a ulo. and it never change... hay... i graduated in elementary nga wala ko man lang nabal-an kung pila gid man ang grade ko...haha! it doesn't matter to me kung anu man na ang resulta sang akon nga performance sa school. as a kid damu lang ako gusto nga ma-explore. sang una wala pa kuryente sa amon, kag sang may ara na, hala! na-adik ako sa telebesyon... super fun ako sang mga anime. ambot nga-a nadala ko pa na hasta subong...hehe... i'm still a child within.
sang high school ako, nagka-crush ako sa classmate ko. ambot? di man s'ya gwapo, di man s'ya law-ay... basta mahipuson lang s'ya kag maalam. before, i just ignored him. wala ko interes sa iya.but then, i noticed that his different from the others.hahaha! know what? every time i looked in his direction, i always cought him looking at me. but i told my self "wala lang na a...basi di man ako ang gina tulok n'ya"...pero my ara gid nga nagahambal inside me nga "tulok sa diriksyon n'ya kay gina tulok ka n'ya!" then, my conscience is right! nadakpan ko naman s'ya nga gatulok sa akon!hehehe...gina-kilig man ako,pero secret lang...kahuluya nga mabal-an n'ya. gin sugid ko sa friend ko ang about sa iya...kag didto na nag-umpisa ang pagsunlog-sunlog sa amon nga duha. s'yempre todo deny ako eh! kahuluya gid! one time sadto, ga-copy kami sa my science namun nga subject... my friend and i were having fun inside the classroom.then my friend told me that she was going to tell my crush about my admiration to him. syempre nagsunggod ako eh...nagpungko ako sa bakante nga bangko sa likod. sige lang ang copy ko. kita ko s'ya nga nagtindog sa may front pero gin ignored ko lang. gosh! nakibot gid ako pagpungko n'ya sa ingod ko! baw! pamatyag ko daw sindutan ang buli ko pagpungko n'ya, 'coz nag-tindog ko dayon kag magpalayo. kahuya man akon hay nahalata gid ako sa gin akto ko that time...errr...nabalikdan ko pa ang friend ko nga nagakinadlaw. baw ang lita!gatululo ang luha n'ya kakadlaw! nami pusdakan. naglala pagid ang sitwasyon para sa akon sang mabal-an sang iban ko pa nga classmates nga s'ya ang crush ko...huhuhu...daw makuob ako everytime nga ginasunlog nila ako sa iya. pro thank God! daw wala n'ya man na-notice.
one time, sang gapakadto ako sa school. nag-agi ako sa may room sang amigo n'y. they were talking that time. i don't know pro pamatyag ko may gatinawag sa akon...wala ako nagbalikid, 'coz if i did, makita ko gid s'ya...nahuya ko daan magtulok sa iya... hasta na sang mabal-an ko nga ang lita-lita ko nga amiga gin sugid n'ya gali sa crush ko ang about sa akon!grrr...pati ang mga amigo n'ya nakabalo sang akon nga sikrito. i tied to act normal sang amo na to ang sitwasyon. bali, kunwari wala ko kabalo sang mga gina pang wakal nila. and every time nga mag-agi ako sa atubangan nila sang migo n'ya naga-smile lang ako,as if daw si waay-waay lang. kag kung ginasinunlog ako sang mga upod namun,gina pabay-an ko lang bisan ang matuod daw gusto ko manago sa palda ko nga daw mantel sa lamisa ang tela...then, para maka-iwas ako sa ila, nag-create ako barrier para sa self ko... i developed another personality in me. the boyish part of me. then, i succeded! napapati ko sila nga t-bird ako!hahaha! normal abi sa akon ang maging sweet sa mga friends ko nga mga girls, so abi nila nag-change na ako sang gender...weird! but i'm enjoying to play the role!hehehe...natapos ang first year nga wala nila mapamatud-an kung crush ko gid man si Ray-an Mamborao. ah! bal-an ko na kung nga-a wala ko interes sa iya, ky abi ko that time he's a gay!errr...sorry..
second year is a little bit awkward...kay ang iban ko nga classmates iba na ang section... pati ang crush ko..huhu...may isa ako ka friend nga masyado ka-attach sa akon. we treated each other as sisters. she cries everytime nga i-aproach ko s'ya...she can't find a better friend sa classroom nila.but i incourage her to be patient...hehehe..medyo epekteb man a...
(ambot a! di ko mabuksan ang friendster ko! agoy!)
whew! hasta lang di danay ang story telling ko a...kapoy magpindot-pindot sang 'keyboard'...